Time Again

Too long without organizing my thoughts.

Too long without taking notes.

Too long without adding a record.

Too long without writing.

The past few weeks I seem to have noticed fluctuations in the time stream. Heh.

Average calls on one day take longer than average calls on another.

Oh yeah. I'm taking calls now. Professionally.

The thing is, my average talk time does fluctuate. Sure, there will be long calls. But they should average out.

I do feel that there are days, hours and minutes that do not pass by at the same rate. On the whole things are speeding up. But there are varitions from moment to moment.

There are still times when a minute will last as long as they did when I was taking piano lessons in Minneapolis. Forever.

And there are times when a year passes more quickly than an afternoon drive in the country on a sunny bright day with my family.

On the whole things are speeding up.

They have to.

One interpretation of the Mayan calendar system suggests that the calendars demonstrate the measurement of a series of speeding up of time periods. That more and more will get done in less time at an increasing rate until people begin to break because of the pressure and the final end.

One of the corporate slogans these days is: Do more with less.

I am so not corporate.

I can be corporate. I can even uphold policies that I do not agree with. I've done that for years.

I learned a long time ago that I am not a capitalist. That's okay.

I also learned that I can get along in this odd society without stooping to the same dog-eat-dog level.

I can converse and work honestly, maintaining what little integrity I am building and still provide a valuable contribution to my boss and the team.

News flash to me.

I had no integrity before.

It is true: Private actions must be equal to or better than public posture.

Oh sure. There were areas in my life that I did pretty good keeping my private and public actions and words equal.

However, there were areas in my life where I was out of balance. I had to change my private behavior to equal the words I gave lip service to.

Those out-of-balance areas threw my whole being out-of-whack. And caused damage to those around me. Especially her.

The entire being, all thought, intention, speech and action, public and private, need to balance to create integrity.

Better late than never. I do have a lot of catch-up to do.

Thank heavens for repentance.