Saturday, July 22, 2006


Lots of un-finished stories.

Maybe they'll be told later.

But for now, I've got a hole in my face.

Not one of the normal ones: nose, mouth, ear holes.


I let my wife do some voodoo on me.

She did it on herself some time ago and I've watched the process with some interest.

It started when she purchased an herbal brew over the internet. She'd read about it, wasn't too grossed out by the pictures on the website and thought it might be something to try. She's got tiny scars on her body where she used it.

I cut myself one too many times while shaving and asked her ten days ago to do it to me.

You see I had a mole on my cheek. Not too big. Between the corner of my mouth and my ear, about 2/3 of the way back. Not terribly noticeable, but a danger when shaving.

So, a week ago Thursday, I asked her to put the herbal gunk on my mole. Remove it. Make it go.

I've been wearing a variety of bright band-aids ever since. They're from a box of "Madagascar" band-aids she bought for our grandson. Mostly I've had penguins on my cheek by my ear. People do ask. Generally I tell them that I'm having a mole removed. Sometimes I'll follow-up with an explanation that I'm using herbs to remove it. Heh. I think the active ingredient is something called "Blood Root". Conjures up all sorts of images in my mind, let me tell you.

When she applied it ten days ago, it felt as if something was immediately attacking my good ol' mole from the roots. Thereafter it was only a matter of keeping the spot moisturized and covered with a band-aid. Can do.

***Oddly gruesome description warning***

If you are pregnant or otherwise queasy already, don't read on.

***You have been warned***

Basically what happens when using this herbal remedy is that it attacks what ever shouldn't be part of my body. I have no idea how the herbs know what is me and what isn't, but this morning she removed the dried up little plug of matter that used to be a mole on my face. Where it used to reside is a small hole in my cheek, about 2/3 of the way back from the right corner of my mouth to my ear.

The strange thing when I checked out the new excavation site this morning after my shower: There were long, gray whiskers left behind growing from the hole in my face. After I had shaved. They are below the regular surface level of my skin. I guess they used to grow through my mole. The herbal stuff really does leave the normal parts of my body alone as it does its voodoo.

Now I've just got to keep the area moist and covered with a band-aid while the skin heals with a little scar tissue. It's already easier to shave.

Eventually we'll buy more band-aids. The decorating possibilities have me thinking.